标题: lA6OPpY98m [打印本页] 作者: gfgdhrt2h 时间: 2014-10-22 13:46 标题: lA6OPpY98m Father's death has been more than two months, Chen Pengjun always feel father is still alive somewhere in his side.
Just open the computer, opening scattered on the desktop or in a folder a video, you can see the hearts miss a familiar figure - that thin, simple dress, the father of the face with a smile. Adobe room in the home, he might YouYouRan pacing in the yard or in the house erhu,WtXzqp7cO7, or on the birthday, smiling at children and grandchildren in the yard, riding four or five tables.
In retrospect, my father never told him, "I love you" to his father he has never expressed such feelings. Until elderly hospitalized after suffering from esophageal cancer, Chen Pengjun first time to try to hug him, hoping to give the elderly bulging awkward.
However, before his father died more than nine years, as long as there are idle, the middle-aged father always carrying a camera back home, the father and mother's words and deeds are shot down.
Father in the fields behind the village farm work, dressed in gray do not slip autumn and old clothes, wielding a hoe, and occasionally stopped, scratched gray hair, told his mother two words - it was 2004, the elderly body bone also tough, lug pole downhill, waist quite DEK straight.
Six years later, his father was white hair, he courtyards fiddle small wheels and wood, wanted a wooden car. Like father is scratching his head thoughtfully, fold the neck is already clear.
The first month of this year, the last time his father pulled the erhu. Old man lying in bed, cheeks slightly concave, bony hands close to the infusion of tape left, his face was full of smiles.
Chen Pengjun off studio, these pictures looks and not professional. Over the years, he was carrying a camera, just capture some fragmented family pictures, the camera sometimes rickety. I do not know why this topic but I do not know how the end of the shoot, but also the photographer most important works: in front of his lens, his father getting older, until away.
The father is really gone, came to understand, say goodbye to a father and son, 10 years is still not enough.
A month after his father died, he compiled a computer images, clip out a 5 minutes 28 seconds of video, coupled with the elderly during his lifetime favorite song, "My father and mother", sent to the Internet's "Song County Bar", and then spread throughout the country. Many netizens to give him a message saying, see this video, I think their parents at home, "my heart sour." Over the media, "stopped all no stopping places" ran an interview with him, and his story more than once on the CCTV news program.
But all this is not important for it. In this May 26 morning began to wonder about his father's fragment to which conspire together, the 47-year-old man only realized Henan thing: never place himself to say "Happy Father's Day" was.
Lens and childhood
Song County, Luoyang City outsiders to reach the town by car is not easy. Coach early morning departure from Luoyang city, diverted 9 18 bends of the mountain, to the Song County is already noon, but the car is still more than one hundred kilometers outside the village. Car sometimes meandering line around the mountain, sometimes along the high road bridge from one hill to another quick sail. Mist lingering sky, verdant hills and then a heavy after a heavy fog, it seems there is no end in sight.
Chenpeng Jun's father, Chen Yun, a lifetime of living in the mountains in this layer. Child, Chen Pengjun father often stand in the neck, followed him over the mountains to go to work. Yeliang mother ate wild with cornmeal and do buns, thirsty to drink foot of the mountain stream. Now think of it, Chen Pengjun will regret that she was not naive: listening to his father and say, "I'm not hungry," himself unceremoniously ate the dry food.
2004, also along this winding mountain road, Chen Pengjun holding a heavy camera back to the car-free village.
It was an imported brand of silver SD cameras, image quality, "the county can catch small TV," village street car can not buy this camera, the county can not buy. He rode the bus to Zhengzhou, from there to retrieve a store in this special order from Shanghai to the machine.
If not, the year before his father was misdiagnosed as bone cancer, wedding photography shop opened in the town, the business is busy may not emerge idea, just to "clearly" photographed the daily lives of their parents, to borrow money to go buy such a camera.
He just went with his father to discuss this thing, when it is full of elderly people do not want to: "Why give me shoot the video?"
"You can shoot a video stood watch ah."
"You do not shoot, I am also good in here, this is not the same be able to see?"
Father did not know had been misdiagnosed as cancer, but also see his son too serious. That year, one heard the doctor say, "bone" is the word, Chen Pengjun ignorant: fast full 40 he had just realized that over seventy years old father could leave at any time. "I'm afraid that if one day, my dad left the country?"
Even his father disapproval, he made up his mind to start his own shooting. Buy camera the next day, Chen Pengjun on carrying it back to the parents' home.
These things nearly 10 years ago, and now in retrospect, was clearly takes just happened yesterday. That day, the old couple was in the field behind the village work. Chen Pengjun want to try the new machine, he had just taken up this big guy, hand involuntarily swinging up. Rickety lens at the farm work dad, Father's action is not consciously stiff up, speak not in the usual tone. Front of the camera a few steps away, Chen Pengjun almost laughed out. He put one off the machine, his father said:. "Dad, you are old when I do not exist to you, that doing the doing."
Remake, when his son's hand or swinging, the father learned not to look into the camera. This was taken in February 2004, the picture was slightly swinging Chen Pengjun on the video front. From that day, Chen Pengjun on more than a new and father along the way.
Speaking, Chen Pengjun first time I saw the camera and lens, it is because his father. At that time only 4 years old, has Tengen with the village children play together in the big elm tree, sister ran and said: "Go home, Dad photographic we give it!"
He asked my sister: "Shajiao photography?"
Followed by sister stepped into the yard, to see the windows nailed a piece of woven indigo denim mother, father playing with in front of a black square box, there are two circles one last look on the side of the box. Followed his father's command, siblings sitting in front of blue cloth, one hand resting on his brother shoulders sister, his father pressed the shutter.
"I'm still Leng Leng looked at the camera, the camera is the Editor thought it?"
10 years later, juvenile SONGXIAN cultural centers working in his father also saw exactly the same square box. His father asked: "Give me your first child photography, this camera is used, is not it?"
Chen Yun was surprised: "It is this 120 camera, you actually remember?"
"My sister still big I was two years old, she does not remember a thing. Could I remember clearly, and the lens is probably destined." Chen Pengjun recalls.
At that time, Chen Yun record his son's growth. In the last 10 years of his life, his son carrying the camera, all the way piecemeal record of his life.
Gradually, the holidays, the whole family and more adapted to the yard carrying out a camera on the scene. Most of the time, the camera loved old father air, his restless, always in the yard bustling about, tinkering. Occasionally, children talk back with his wife, his eyes glanced over crouched feet are playing son of the camera, showing a bit "This child fiddle Shaya" confusion.
After his father died, Chen Pengjun home rummaging through boxes to find the 18 small videos and 20G of memory cards, watching, crying: inside are full of father.
Images and articles
This father died two months ago, Chen Pengjun video filmed himself looked and looked, I just feel inadequate everywhere.
Had my dad speak speech, and now look at the film's dialogue can be heard and Father how good?
If the beginning of the dry farming father who did not wipe weird action remake in the ground, it now appears that is more than interesting?
Had to think about, will be a good father, what lens to shoot, then shoot on one, today may not so much regret it?
Father before his death, Gesanchawu riding electric bicycles, mothers bring in their own land planted vegetables door to door to the living in the vicinity of six children. To 80 years old, my father often rode a bicycle to go out, my mother sat in the back seat of the car, an old married couple who can do without.
In those years, always thinking, next time you want to pat my father came all the way along the village street car, with two pocket fresh looking fresh vegetables. But such a mortal time slip past him in the end was too late to take the heart of the most memorable shots.
Why is this the most homely scene failed to stay? "Maybe because always busy?" Chen Pengjun thought, pause for a few seconds and then categorically denied, "There is not a busy problem ......"
To parents as the protagonist of the video looks more Chenpeng Jun little more regret their own culture, obviously my heart is full of affection for his father, can also express a little out. Bie anxious, he wrote in the paper very ambitious sentence: "Every time you see the video, you can always feel alive, we never left your life is so simple and kind and hardworking. great, Dad Yeah, I think you! "
He is really old remembered his childhood. Father carrying him over the mountains, go home and seventy six work outside the village. His father sat shoulder, threw, from time to time to see Dad carry the bag house uncovered a small buns, handed his head to give yourself to eat.
Six-year-old, when Chen Pengjun watched the movie "Sparkling Red Star", for several days in the village claiming Pan Dongzi also take bread from the kitchen wore when cap, with a small partner played a pass. His father saw him, tiger face and asked him: "? Can not spoil the food is not"
A few days later, the house more than a top Red Army cap, it is his father, not just gray cloth hat, as well as a cut from the plastic cover of the notebook down Red Star. With Dad's help, in a bunch of little gremlins in the village, on the "change of position? Of."
These care, he could not shoot out. He can capture the screen, the father is often busy in their own yard. In the adobe walled out ten meters square yard, planted a few rows of plots, placed several bonsai are playing out of his father. Father was the smartest man he had ever seen feat. Usually what bad neighbors have broken furniture appliances, the father can repair; also written a good calligraphy, understand art, good instrument, the erhu Ruqirusu handedly.
Usually in her father's house for dinner, father and son always talk about. Probably in 2011, when over 80 Zheng Chen Yun heard missing when the studio photo shoot costume used to help his son do not have to adhere to the plane.
"You understand this? Can not toil bad body." Chen Pengjun hesitated.
"Zheng was an over 2000 pieces, right? Fee money doing that, I'll do you just bought it wants to put the strings."
After more than two months, father really gave him an zither. Son surprised look, he played the one hand, smiled and said, "Music Theory is a pass Belden." Lens, he earnest on this guzheng delineate the props Xiaozhuan body "Qinyun zither" words, is still painted on the next two seal.
That year, the elderly have become accustomed to his shooting, gradually, as the lens is nothing. But his son began to feel, and sometimes the lens is not enough to express his feelings for his father. He sometimes thought, if he could write a what 'father as a mountain, "this type of article just fine.
"I was really able to feel the kind of love my father,E582YMAvXM, really heavier than mountains, deeper than the sea. Alas, this feeling, I can not tell, can not tell ......" he said, waving his hands helplessly .
He met through the network to work in the county Bureau of Justice "Seven Peaks Autumn Temple", but also to the people to ask too seriously:? "I do not rhetorical exercise, you are intellectuals, could you help me write" At that time, Chen Pengjun shooting father videotapes, add up to already have more than 60 hours ago.
"Seven Peaks Autumn Temple" apart from anything else agreed. He recalls that his father heard Chen Pengjun to beat the old record of thing, especially moving. He remembered after his father died, the family could not find a satisfactory actually how the photos to.
However, these conventions have not had time to implement, it looks extra time, in the end passed blink of an eye. "Seven Peaks Autumn Temple" really see these pictures, or this year on May 27. That morning, Chen Pengjun upload SONGXIAN bar where a full day with the completion of the video clip "My father and mother." "Seven Peaks Autumn Temple" to see all tears: "How can I have a few words to describe pale Mr CHAN industrious life?"
Today, Chen Yun buried in the yard behind his home cornfields. Paste it in familiar friends who go out Chen old man's grave bow.
That afternoon, Chen Pengjun and brothers have been silent on the grassy mound station into a semi-circle, are attracted by several video dial reporters three thousand three hundred twenty-two talking about how to shoot, interviews friends. At some point, I do not know who is tearful shouted: "Dad, we see you!" Moment between heaven and earth suddenly quiet, with only the sound of wind blowing through the cornfield.
Memories and regret
After picking up the camera, Chen Pengjun left many lives with his father-related pictures. Big Brother house repair sheds when father split in the yard of bricks; brother home needs of small scooters, my father got two small wheels, banging put Che Gulu sawed followed on. His clearance work drink, a hyperextension, skinny neck - this is the old father was left less than two years ago when diagnosed with advanced esophageal cancer imaging.
There are more a togetherness time. Holidays, grandchildren have returned to my grandparents' home for dinner. Little children laughing and joking downtown into a ball, some hand holding a flower dog, eyes narrowed crescent; some mouth still stained cream, innocent eyes staring curiously lens. Old father often smiled at the side, West Ramp sunlight hit his face, and warm. This time, Chen Pengjun often just shoot video cable to connect to the TV screen down to play, the whole family watched together, chatting and laughing.
He noted that his father also like to see this video, especially the kids like to see the lens.
10 years, the elderly often accompanied grandchildren play together, often at his wife when cooking dough, beside helping fire. Different years, he was often a man in the house erhu, pulling pulling, wrinkles increases year after year, year after year people thin.
Each time, took on his father's video, taken a small hospital, always pray wildly thinking:. "Dad, next time I would also like to give you a shot."
He knew that his father and my heart there is regret. Now think of it, Chen Pengjun was "especially not the taste." Chen Yun erhu pull a good hand, sometimes listening to the sound of the piano, Chen Pengjun feeling that people, who put their faith in the melody mood inside.
To the later years, Dad often worried reveals: "Dad gotta pass on this erhu Yeah!"
However, Chen Pengjun several brothers who do not like the erhu. Once last year, watching father against erhu tiger face, he could not help but loose mouth: "Well, I learn."
Father overjoyed: "Are you serious?"
Only half-eaten lunch, his father put the bowl Wang Zhuoshang hastily: "eat it!" Then beckoned toward his son:. "Follow me into the house."
"Zuosa?"
"Do not mean to learn erhu it?"
Father turned aside music seriously, looking for some simple tunes to his son practice. Chen Pengjun boss reluctantly took the bow, draw pulled.
Son did not listen to Luanla marginal creaky, Chen Yun erhu eleven to cook the mark: pull here is Do, here is Re, Mi ...... here is so this should exercise ...... Finally, he put his hand erhu handed his son: "Here, you take home to practice with."
Chen Pengjun erhu is placed in the bedroom, but he never picked up a decent practiced. Studio where the business is very busy, busy time, Chen Pengjun couple of weeks may not be able to return to a home.
"We have never spoken of this to the erhu." But he knows, "Dad just do not say, my heart must be very disappointed."
In the media, because holding the camera to shoot his father for 10 years, was called "Luoyang dutiful son." He heard this, he sad. "My father has passed away, looking back I thought, there are so many regrets. Parents life was not easy, but also the opportunity to accompany their every day less." He put a video biography Internet, is to remind users know, taking advantage of parents still around, a lot of care to them. But the media overwhelming "dutiful son" title made him "a heart like a needle like pain":. "I know I'm not the dutiful son, I'm doing is not enough, I simply can not afford the dutiful son said"
Childhood, brothers, only he followed his father to live with. Needless to say, his embroidered "learn every day," the small bag, is the father personally seam. Home from school every day, in the lamp, his father helped him brush up all over homework. "My dad always wanted me to be able to go to college, but I let him down."
When in high school, Chen Pengjun hooked photography, reading does not wish to say. A stubborn temper up, saying nothing, doing farm work directly Shimoji go. School called him to come back to class, he does not listen to the students in the house wrote: think photography is not? Just buy a roll of film, I can help you take pictures!
A year later, seeing his son every day still wondering photographs, hissed out of the money used to buy the red photo syrup, Chen Yun finally could not resist: "I help you open a photo studio, you 'to business Yang Yi ', not in? "
Chen Pengjun overjoyed: "in the in the in!"
Studio choose the most prosperous towns in the street car, along with the father and son made from the house, add a device. Studio where the props are his father, as well as 30 pieces of 3 meters high, accounting for the entire wall curtain background, are also father and then 10 years in one drawn.
After his father's death, these past do not mind the little things suddenly become clear. Now, in the new "Taipei Charo wedding photography" studio in a busy always think from time to time, many years ago, his father was originally named "Plains" in front of the studio, he just watched with great apologetic to put aside Brush father ride home, thin and small back, a little bit lost in the midnight dark curtain inside.
Old Man and the Sea
If this 10 years, what is the thing to let Chen Pengjun think that there is no regret, then, probably with his father to see the sea. July 2012, in Luoyang hospital, Chen Pengjun was told his father suffering from esophageal cancer. The doctor said Chen Yun's life can continue for six months.
And brothers and sisters cried after the game, Chen Pengjun made up my mind: and immediately all hands down business with her father to see the sea - before starting out on taking advantage of the final diagnosis.
Chen Yun life did not come out too barberry mountains. In the past, the county organization travel, motion sickness can not be away from his wife, he is also at home guarding. Later, he was suffering from heart disease, the more reluctant to travel a long distance.
But Chen Pengjun remember, my father said, want to see the sea. Wait another hospital inspection report came out even four or five days "anyway have to go to Luoyang get reported, it is better to open a little further, to Shandong to play it and see the ocean." He said to his father pretending to be easy.
This time, Chen Yun did not insist. Then, to his mother prepared on motion sickness pills, Chen Pengjun with Big Brother, Big Sister "escort" the parents drove all the way to the east away.
In the sunshine on the beach side, Chen Yun staring toward the sea for a long time. He and his son walking on the shore, and later took off his shoes, Lueqi trousers, stepping waves go all the way in the past. Chen Pengjun want leaning on his father, but Chen Yun walked in the waves, let go of his son's hand. Suddenly, the elderly innocence big play, a stoop, hand dipped in water, and then lick your fingers, surprise and said: "! Really salty seawater"
See his son took out his mobile shooting, Chen Yun also said to him: "Wait it." Then juggle wildly wearing a pair of sunglasses from his pocket. "Dad, you are so cool." Chen Pengjun not help him joked, "This is where Chen Yun, Chen Yi is simply a."
Inadvertently, he saw old father rubbed his eyes:. "I never thought that I more than 80 years old, and really see the sea of"
Chen Yun's death the next day, Chen Pengjun finishing his father's possessions, Congguizili pulls out a book manuscript entitled "Memories life," the. Manuscripts written on the reverse side of the paper medical records, writing some painting, but neatly stapled.
That was his father's words:
"My family ancestral home of Zhang Huai Yang Jialing, said it also considered a medium-well-off people. Less than sixty grandfather died, his father Zhongfu, nicknames have to baby, honest aging and does not know the word. Around 1927 years ago (in the late confound) Swordsman husband was away when the small, to flee to the cicadas Heyu Church, local pick up is live, mistaken for Swordsman, with a red-hot iron burned buttocks, tortured. widow after her grandmother, caught the West by East, when the All industry production father (three acres of thin, a thatched cottage), will redeem his father out. "
Children have been to the old father concealed the disease, but two months after the death of his father, Chen Pengjun often wonder, perhaps the old man would have insight into everything, I'm afraid the truth make us crash, and therefore does not expose the lies of his family.
Returnees to see sunshine, the father admitted to hospital. sister noticed that every night, by mobile phone light, the elderly always in bed tirelessly what was written.
Children who do not know, the dark, Chen Yun has begun to recall his life.
"I'm in early November 1930 born Zhang Huai ditch plains seven uncle home. ...... And Zhang front, symbiotic Mengliang, Eleonora, Peng Li, Ai-qin, Ning, Min, four men and two women now live in car Village, adjacent to the Quartet sisters, intimacy, something matters to discuss, have difficulty with when, harmony plus I have eighty-three, four generations,air max requin, his wife Zixiao,PbgmLlSRd2, a recreational incomparable.
"My life's work identified are: motivated, hard-working business, decency, solidarity comrades, the struggle of the poor (refer to previous anti-left and anti-rightist movement, the light when the power will not fight people) long music, calligraphy, art. expertise, was incorporated into the "heavy vehicles Village," a book.
! "Bale sentence: I did not ashamed of the party, the party did not shame me, life go more than a dozen units finally drop a 'good guy' reputation, good life of peace Well!
"The sea is the place I most want to see my life for what is not interested in this opportunity is over 82, has been fully mentally prepared for death, with the exception did not see the sea but unfortunately, this time to take this empty I have to go to the sea, so the sea erase my past, I now scour, wash my regret.
"Looking at the boundless sea, I was excited, excited, lamented short life. Loved one by the children's father, eighty-year-old old man, soon passed away! I nostalgia without regret ...... kids round I wish, I can not live up to the children's filial piety. "
This nearly 3,000-word memoir, the sixth of the length of all the sunshine in the description to see the sea trip. But, to see the sea of ??this period, Chen Pengjun father produced video, also nearing completion.
Erhu and coffin
After his father's death, Chen Pengjun felt "heart simmering effort, not tell, do not know how to write." He pulls out from the house nearly 10 years to shoot video, I watched, tearful.
"If you can, I would like for my father to shoot 10 or 20 years."
He followed the sound of the tape back to the 2004 daylight just that afternoon, picking up his first camera in front of his father in the fields. That year, his father also possessor of a black and white flower dog. There are times, he put the dog to hold up on pots, little guy in the above Baba looked around, looked at Father laughed, we all laughed.
He also remembered his father always restless, when Bubu pipes in this yard, doing the car, even fiddle out of a zither.
See their parents in the kitchen busy shot, he remembered a lot of time to their own home, do not want to eat snacks, do not want to drink, the mother will be relaxed and say "It must also went to bed at midnight last night, it did not have breakfast in the morning," he cook to eat his favorite fried bread. Light a fire in the side of his father, his fire burned so busy, not rubbing the mother's face is good ......
"My father, his life six paying too much for our children, he was alive, I did not make him less operating day heart, I have a few old people, but he told me, love me, or with a child the same. I have nothing to return to him? "the whole day, Chen Pengjun sitting in the bedroom, at the computer desk pulls no chapter seemingly scattered shots, according to his own memories of a section of stitching together.
Finally, a video about his father, a shooting earlier this afternoon early. At that time, the old father recuperate at home, guarding the side of see him watching TV is listless, he said: "? Dad, you gave me to pull it, I want to hear your segment erhu erhu."
"Really, you want to hear?" The old man's eyes flashed the light, not the son helped himself sat up in bed. Quilt soft, erhu bad place, Father muttering loudly, commissioning of the two lower chord, the music begins with the strings smooth floating out.
Chen Pengjun crossed his arms in front of his father sitting on the phone's camera quietly toward his father. This is the last time his father pulled the erhu, he smiling, like a child with expectant eyes and asked his son: "? Me (ear bad) almost hear insufficiency, also like it's going to pull no"
"Like, like!" Chen Pengjun kept saying. Turned away, his tears welling up. Listening to the babbling of voices, he knew that his father frail, have no energy left.
From February 2004 to 2013 the first month, on his father's video photographed here, screeching halt.
In fact, you can also have some behind the original. Day of the funeral, as before, Chen Pengjun also took the camera back to the old house.
The house, the junior who are weeping around his grandfather's remains. He thought he could surely, carrying machine, recording his father in the last paragraph of this world journey. But peeled off the lens cap, lens just scribbled on passing the house in a circle, and finally fell on his father's portrait.
The 38 seconds of the shot stopped at that moment. Chen Pengjun never shot does not go, he realized that the chance of their own has never passed. "My father only gave me 10 years to shoot him, and now I can not have that chance."
He can do is put the erhu and music, into his father's coffin. Our reporter Huang ~ ~
(Original title: father day together)